One to One Coaching

I offer free 30 minute telephone/Skype consultations for people wanting to find out more about coaching on the 'baby decision'. Email me at and assistant Laura will respond and arrange an appointment with you. Visit for more information about my coaching services.

Monday, 28 November 2016

Stop asking us when we are going to have children!

A common theme I hear from most of my clients is how difficult it is to deal with intrusive questions about children. It is very strange that someones parental status seems to be an area that seems to be fair game for others to comment on.   It's a particularly painful question for those people who do want children but whose partners don't.  Many people will not be telling their friends and families that they are arguing with their partner about the baby decision or that they have decided not to have children because their partner doesn't want kids.

I recently read an article, published in the Metro that  lays out all the reasons to STOP asking couple when they are going to have children.

'There are a number of different reasons why posing this question casually is akin to walking on to an emotional minefield. Mines such as not actually wanting children, not being able to conceive or having marital problems, all of which hurt when stepped on.'

When I work with coaching clients facing intrusive questions and comments, we usually work on ways that clients can be clearer with their boundaries.  Often thinking through a good and strong response can help.    Being honest about how difficult and painful the question is can be a good strategy.  You don't need to go into detail but a statement like 'This is actually a difficult topic for us and we would rather not discuss it.' can put an end to the questioning.