One to One Coaching

I offer free 30 minute telephone/Skype consultations for people wanting to find out more about coaching on the 'baby decision'. Email me at and assistant Laura will respond and arrange an appointment with you. Visit for more information about my coaching services.

Monday, 19 January 2009

Childfree Women Role Models

I got an email from a regular reader of the blog asking for more about childfree positive role models. Some I know include: Helen Mirren, Kylie Mignone, Betty Boothroyd. Also historical figures include Florence Nightingale. Can you add some more?

Saturday, 10 January 2009

Interview with author of Eat Work and Pray

An interview with the bestselling author of the book 'Eat Work and Pray' came out in the Guardian today. I was particularly interested in how the decision not to have children played out in her life. This is a particuarly relevant quote:

The journey started with an act of bona fide bravery: an admission that she didn't want to have children, not with her husband, not with anyone, ever. It's not expressed as categorically as this in the book, and when we find her appealing to God from the bathroom floor while her husband sleeps innocently in the bedroom next door, it reads like an overreaction. She was praying because she didn't know what else to do; she hated her marriage and didn't want to have a baby at that point. But she was only 31 - what was the big deal?

"I think it was a crisis because the pressure was on to have kids," she says. "My ex-husband was very eager to do it. There was no neutral position. Me saying I don't want to have kids was effectively me saying I don't want to be married, if that's what the conditions of the marriage were. I'd also lived a very accelerated decade in my 20s. My career started young and I was really ambitious, and then I had success and I hung out with people who were much older. I think I might have been temporally misplaced, so I thought I was 40. It was a premature midlife crisis."

The end of her marriage constituted the first real failure Gilbert had dealt with. The crisis was so huge, she says, because she was not used to disappointing people or herself, a sneaky piece of self-promotion. She believes that her breakdown was also fanned by grief for the children she'd never have. "When I diagnose my depression now, I think it was partially about saying goodbye to these kids that I always expected to have but already knew that I wouldn't."

Gilbert then went on to marry an older man - who didn't want children which she says was a conscious choice.

Wednesday, 7 January 2009

New Year - A new leaf!

Hello readers old and new! Welcome to 2009!

Yes, I am going to attempt to turn over a new leaf and post more regularly - I realise my posts have been somewhat erratic in the last few months - I've just been trying to juggle my expanding coaching practice, my leadership programme I'm doing through the lovely CTI, my post-natal group facilitators course and my fundraising work with non-profits. So the blog has suffered abit!

But, I know many of you are finding your way here through googling baby decision related questions - and I know from feedback from regular readers that many find the blog and the articles I point to here, helpful to you in making this important decision. So one of my new year resolultions is to post here at least twice a week in 2009.

Do you have any resolutions for the year ahead?