One to One Coaching

I offer free 30 minute telephone/Skype consultations for people wanting to find out more about coaching on the 'baby decision'. Email me at and assistant Laura will respond and arrange an appointment with you. Visit for more information about my coaching services.

Friday, 29 October 2010

Young women advised to freeze ovarian tissue for the future

This week there has been alot in the news about calls from a fertility expert to encourage young women in their late teens and early 20's to freeze ovarian tissue - as an insurance policy for the future. The idea is that this tissue could be grafted onto the woman's overies in the future Below is a link to a BBC article about this.

But as others in the article point out, it is too soon to know if the technology is reliable enough to work in the future. I tend to agree with this thought from Susan Seenan:

"But Susan Seenan of Infertility Network UK told BBC News there was no guarantee that any of the currently used methods, including IVF, would ensure a woman could conceive.

"People should be very careful not to rely on this as a guarantee of success in the future, because you can't actually ensure your fertility.

"There could be other fertility issues, such as blocked tubes or an infertile partner.

"People need to know that it is not a guarantee."


Kay g said...

I have been crying all day care I have finally found a man that is the one and treats me amazing but gave me a hard "no" on having kids. I have always wanted kids. I don't know if I can give up a man I love deeply for a child I don't even have. I don't know how to give that up. I'm 32 and scared

Beth said...

Dear Kay,

How heartbreaking! It's such a difficult thing when you finally think you have met someone who is 'the one'. If it's any consulation, I don't believe that there ever is just one person for us and that as sad as a break- up is, you can move on and find someone else whoh would want the same thing as you do.

My suggestion is that you and your partner look to have couples counselling to see if there is any way through this. But sometimes, when what we want is not compatible with the other person, there is sadly no other choice than to end the relationship. If your partner does not want to go into couples counselling, I suggest you find someone locally you can talk to and work through what you want to do.

Carin said...

I always wanted kids. The man I live with a loved told me 15 years ago that he didn't want any more & never wanted to marry. We broke up.

Fast forward to last year. He calls me up and tells me that he and his wife are divorcing. His then two year old is going to be from a divorced home. He's upset and wants to talk. He is my first love and though it pained me when he married and made me sick to think he had another child, I met up with him.

The encounter leads to us casually dating and then I (being 35) said either you agree with giving me what I have always wanted or we end it and go our separate ways. I gave him time to respond, but let him know that the time was limited. He responds and wants to be together.

To give our relationship a fair shot, I leave my life that I loved, the city and job I adore and move 3 hours away to be with him. Now, I can't get anything from him other than "not now".

I tell him, I'm a planner and I want to know when he's thinking the time will be. No valid responses come from these conversations.

So, now I'm living in his home with a daily reminder that he has everything and I have almost nothing that I want. Fine. I'm good at walking away (how else does one remain unmarried at my age). However, is there another option?

I'm looking into sperm donors. I figure if he doesn't want another kid, then I will fulfill my own dreams (yes, I would be honest with him about it). Just want to know why this would not be an option since it gives me everything I want too (minus the ring).

I know if this continues without resolution or a plan of action, I will become bitter towards him and his child with his ex-wife. I do not ever want that for either of them. But, I do believe my dreams, wants and needs matter.

Advice on how to tell him my decision? I'm blunt, so nothing covert or sly. I will not be anything less than honest. Just don't want to be so blunt that it hurts him.