Is the decision to have children a rational decision?

I love this article that was published in the Guardian this Saturday.

The article looks at research that has shown that using rational decision making processes may not necessarily help in the decision making any more than 'listening to your gut' or your instinct.

That's why as a coach I often work with helping clients listen to their instinct, and I use creative techniques such as visulazations, standing up and shifting perspectives, exploring polarities (i.e. freedom vs autonomy) that they may be struggling with. And I do more and more work around conscious embodiment - which is around listening to the wisdom of the body. So I might ask a client - so what do you feel in your body when you think about this decision. Or I might say so what would your heart say if it had a voice?

When I am first talking to a client who is particularly analyatic and rational I usually ask 'So has their analyatic mind and rational thought process helped them get any closer to making a decision about whether to have a child or not. The answer is inevitably no.

That's because the decision to have children is definately not a rational one. No amount of listing pros and cons can really help - we need to engage our emotions and our creative sides to help us with this dilemma.

Comments

Kristin Lacy said…
This is exactly where I am, in my gut I want to have a baby, despite the fact that I never wanted one before. There are so many rational reasons why I shouldn't have one (like passing on bad genes, being the alpha personality and bread winner, our financial situation, etc) so I've been having a mental tug of war. So I'm doing what I always do when faced with a decision, read everything I can find on the subject.

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