Book Review - Motherhood: Is It For Me?

Happy New Year! If you have been struggling with trying to decide whether to be a mother or not, then 2018 might be the year you move forward and make the decision.

To start the New Year, I wanted to introduce you all to a fantastic book and resource by Denise L. Carlini and Ann Davidman called 'Motherhood:Is It For Me?.   When I started coaching on this topic 10 years ago, there was very little out there to support those of us who really weren't sure whether we wanted to have children or not.  And, as most of you know, that's what led me to start Ticktock Coaching and write my book Baby or Not? Making the Biggest Decision of Your Life.

Yet, I was just starting out on my journey to develop my coaching practice to help women, Denise and Ann had already been working for 10 years with women on the very same issue in the USA!   

Denise and Ann are experienced psychotherapists who have developed a program and process for helping women through making this decision.   It's very evident and apparent how much their experience working with individual women over many years has informed this book.  They have spent two decades - 20 years - creating the program which takes readers carefully through the full process they use with individual clients.   This depth of experience which the book and their process is based upon really gives the book a solid foundation that gives you trust that the writers know what you are going through. 

There approach very much chimes with my own belief in coaching on the baby decision.  This passage in their introduction very much resonated with me.

'We've learned that your uncertainty is complex and likely accompanied by powerful feelings such as fear, ambivalence, doubt, confusion, sadness and shame.  Experience has taught us that a deep knowing of what you truly want must precede making a clear and informed decision.'

The book takes you through the 12 week process from Week 1 'Preparing for Your Journey' to Week 12  'Arriving'.    Throughout the process, they give a range of writing and creative exercises (including many creative visualisation exercises which I find so valuable) to help you reflect on yourself, your fears, desires, who you are and then finally, helping you to move forward out of the limbo of indecision. 

If you are interested in buying the book or finding out more about their work you can find out more on their website at Motherhood Is it for Me?

I'm so glad that Denise and Ann  - and other practitioners in the world such as Baby Dilemma in the Netherlands - are working to help women (and sometimes men) who are struggling to decide whether to have kids or not.   There are so many women all over the world who are wondering whether motherhood is for them that we need a variety and range of people, books and resources to help them navigate their way through this important decision.