Actively choosing to have children..... or not

I was having coffee with a new friend this weekend.  I was explaining about the work I do, coaching women who are trying to decide whether to have children or not.

'That's so interesting... but I never thought it was actually an active decision.  I thought it was something that either just happened or didn't. But actually, it's a bigger decision than getting a new job or buying a car and we spend a great deal of time thinking over those decisions so why not the baby decision'

It's very common for people to be surprised that the decision to have children is a really active decision that many people do indeed struggle with.

One of the key reasons for this is that there is still a default assumption that people do want to have children and will eventually try for children- and that if they don't, it is because they can't because of fertility.

But the more and more, this assumption is being challenged - particularly by those who are struggling to make this crucial decision.