One to One Coaching

I offer free 30 minute telephone/Skype consultations for people wanting to find out more about coaching on the 'baby decision'. Email me at and assistant Laura will respond and arrange an appointment with you. Visit for more information about my coaching services.

Friday, 2 May 2008

Is there a 'good time' to have kids - particularly when thinking about your career?

It's a question that I do hear - when is the right time to have kids? Is it when I've reached a certain stage in my career? The blogger Grad Mommy, who I mentioned before, has this to say in this post:

'There is so much consternation amongst graduate students about when the best time to start a family is. I’ve heard it everywhere along the grad student - tenure continuum: wait until after classes are done, no, wait until you’ve defended your proposal, no, wait until you’ve landed your first position, no, wait until after you’ve gotten tenure. I remember a professor back in my freshman year of college saying,
'There’s never a good time to get married or have children. Just do it.'
I followed his advice.'

She then talks in the post how it is more difficult with kids but it is all doable.

My feeling is that while you do need to weigh up the pros and cons of whether you want to do certain things before having kids (for example I would love to do a programme called Leadership in the US now - but I'm not willing to leave my 3 year old to travel out there 4 times a year for a week each so I'll have to wait till he is abit older), at the end of the day, if you do want kids, if you know you want them in your future (but just aren't sure when), I'd have to say, yeah, just go for it!! The problem is - when will you know it's the right time? As Grad Mommy says above, you could go on forever. In my case, I could have thought 'oh, just after my coaching course, oh just after Leadership, oh just after I land a few great coaching contracts.'

And before you know it, my biological clock would have been running down.

It's a tough call. Not to be made lightly.

But, then if you want to make it work - you will.


womaninawindow said...

Oh, you would wait forever for the PerfecT time, it's all about priorities, isn't it? And yes, thanks, I do like that Quaker notion too. Seems to make sense to me.

Sass E-mum said...

A smart move could be to at least work in a family-friendly business with good work/life balance policies, maternity benefits and flexible working.

That way if/when the children decision is made, work is ready to meet you half way.

I'd definitely check out a firm's approach to families before moving jobs. I'd use networking sites to make anonymous enquiries.

Jonathan said...

Never a good time, the little brats just ruin your life anyway