The ticking of the biological clock and careers
Have been surfing the net looking for relevant articles and found this rather blunt article about women, our biological clock and careers. Basically the author recommends that we all turn our attention to finding a mate in our 20's with the same zeal as we did for our careers. She also has a blog and wrote a blog entry here with lots of comments on her entry
On one hand, yes if you are planning on having kids it is better to try to conceive before the age of 35. (although this author argues it's best before you are 30!.
But I don't think that we can plan our lives and our relationships around our biological clock. I don't think it works like that for most people. It also implys that we can plan and control everything in our lives - we can't. For some of the woman I coach, they have fallen in love with someone and then, it turns out that they don't want kids. Or you don't meet the right person - no matter how many personal ads you answer.
On one hand, yes if you are planning on having kids it is better to try to conceive before the age of 35. (although this author argues it's best before you are 30!.
But I don't think that we can plan our lives and our relationships around our biological clock. I don't think it works like that for most people. It also implys that we can plan and control everything in our lives - we can't. For some of the woman I coach, they have fallen in love with someone and then, it turns out that they don't want kids. Or you don't meet the right person - no matter how many personal ads you answer.
Comments
Sure, a young woman might have two goals - one towards your career and one towards being a mother. But women are biological entities, so to reach the goal of being a mother a woman does consider their fertility.
Since statistics show higher levels of risk in having babies from the age of 35, a woman with the goal of becoming a mother might consider finding a partner while she's in your 20s. She might also want to settle in a child-friendly country/city, and try to live in a child-friendly house.
Don't get me wrong, I certainly don't think that you could or should plan every aspect of your life. Things often don't go the way they are planned. I am just supportive of a moderately proactive attitude towards what you want.
Quite simply, the men I was meeting in my 20s weren't partner/father material. I had a terrific time though.
Not convinced I'd have had the patience for motherhood in my 20s.
Anyhoo, I'll go and read the article and see if I think any differently afterwards...
As you say Beth, this is a blunt article. It's short and not very sophisticated.
I think I'm a better parent for having waited. I'm happy to accept that it's down to fate if I'm lucky enough to have a second child.